Piles of paper

Is it just me or do you have a paper pile in your house too? You know the place where all the stuff you don't want to deal with right now this very minute goes to? Namely bills, wedding invitations, christening invitations, join our charity invitations...well there is one in our house permanently, but as I discovered today the Paper Only rule which applies to the paper pile has been twisted somewhat over the several weeks, no who am I kidding, months that the pile has been allowed to grow.

In there I found:

A box of blister plasters. Obviously placed there because going to the bathroom and having to reach down - all that way - to the bathroom cabinet and place them in the foot related wash bag is just way too arduous.

A voucher for Diggerland. Paper yes, but officially classed as what we call A Birthday Present, so should not have been placed in the pile, SIMON. And to think I was so proud of myself when I bought you that...

Several elastic bands. Seriously this is a mystery. There are always elastic bands in our house everywhere but we never buy them, so where do they actually come from? I blame the Postman. Not quite sure why, but I do.

A wire with a thingy on the end. During my let me talk you through all these technical things I bring into the house, and explain how we need them JUST TO STAY ALIVE lecture from Simon, I learnt this is a very important wire which stops the house from burning down, or something.

A sock. Not mine. Actually I don't think it's Simon's either, hmm.

Orange peel.

A dead fly.

A squashed raspberry.

Bills with squashed raspberry on them.

A wind-up birthday cake.

The remote control.

And at the bottom, a Post-it Note bearing the words: Sort paper pile IMMEDIATELY.

Moving it to an entire new room on a different floor of the house counts as sorting, right?